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Tuesday, August 3, 2021

Taking A Stand Creates an Invitation

I had always wanted to become a motivational speaker and author. Once my military service was over, I dreamed of writing a book about my experiences and touring the country as a speaker on women in the military. But then came a traumatic divorce, a sick child, and the dream was pushed to the back of my mind. I thought about a few topics that I felt passionate about and even jotted down proposals and book outlines. But life always "happened". Still I never gave up on my dream and promised myself that if the opportunity ever came, I would grab it and go.

Then I met Ken McArthur. He hosted marketing events. I had retired from the military and was working as an event planner. I was excited when Ken hired me to coordinate his events. I was even more excited when one day, after working with him for several years, he invited me to speak at one of his event. .

The seminar led to more speaking engagements...and more contacts. Eventually, it led to the publisher and editor who would help me bring my book to life. 

So now I am a speaker and an author. Maybe not exactly how I had first envisioned it. But perhaps as it was always meant to be. 

Most rewarding is knowing that I have inspired others. My daughter and her husband are working on plans for their consulting firm. My grandson is busily taking steps to create a clothing line. 

When you chase a dream, you're taking a stand for yourself and that’s powerful. It creates a beautiful invitation to others. In fact, your path might just inspire your border bullies before long. Here are a few tips for sharing your journey…

Explain What You’re Doing

When I first actually started writing my book, I discussed it with my husband every week. We'd talk about how much I had written, what I was struggling with, and  what I was doing to finish the book. 

I wanted to share my journey with my husband. I also liked the accountability that it provided. Although he would ask questions and worry about things like the cost for the editor, I didn’t let them hold me back. I realized his doubts weren’t about me—they were his own limiting beliefs. I wanted to inspire him to challenge them.

But I wouldn’t choose to share my story with someone that was toxic. I have a relative that’s negative no matter what I say or do. I didn’t share my journey with her.

Welcome Transparency

As you tell others what you’re doing, don’t be surprised if they’re inspired. I knew my grandson had been listening to me when he brought up his passion for art and design and his desire to create his own fashion line. 

When a friend or loved one starts talking about their goals or ambitions, don’t become the border bully! Offer to support them any way you can. For my grandson, I invited him to artists and designers I know and have offered to help him with his marketing..

Be Patient

I recommend letting people open up naturally. In the past year, I’ve learned that no two journeys are just alike. My daughter's path to her consulting firm and my grandson's path to being a designer look entirely different than my path to becoming an author and speaker. That doesn’t mean one is better than the other.

A person who’s just beginning to understand concepts like personal growth may not be ready to wade into deeper waters. They may not be able to commit to pursuing a BIG goal right away. But that doesn’t mean that you can’t support them. Remind your loved ones and friends that you believe in them and are rooting for their success.