Self Esteem and Your Goals

Mindset. I talk about it - a lot. I write about it - even more! Why? Because a great overall mindset is essential to achieving your goals.

How you think and feel about yourself and your business is extremely important. It impacts everything you do. Even setting your goals. Here's an example:

"I'd like to earn $500 extra a month, so I can have a little money left over after I pay my bills."

What kind of goal is that?! It's weak. It's definitely not SMART. There is no motivation to really go for it.

Actually, this goal was one of MY first goals - before I understood the power of mindset and worked to change mine.

And see how my goal has changed!  This was the first goal I wrote with my mindset coach shortly after beginning to work with him:

"By the end of the year, I will develop a strategy to earn an extra $3000 per month."

Do you see the difference?  Instead of "I'd like to...maybe...if I could", now "I will"!  Instead of $500 I was going to earn $3000.  I wasn't in this business  so I could have a few dollars left over at the end of the month.  I wanted to earn a living.  And I set a deadline.  You can't have a goal without a deadline.  Otherwise you can just keep plodding along forever, hoping that SOMEDAY you will reach it.

Of course, it's not enough just to set a good goal.  You also have to work to achieve it.  Self-esteem factors in there too. 

Poor mindset and low self-esteem can cause you to self-sabotage your business, even if you aren't consciously aware that you are doing it. If you went out partying last night when you knew you had a presentation to do this morning, you might know what I'm talking about! The proper mindset and high-self esteem may have kept you from making that decision. So instead of being groggy and possibly hung-over today, you would be bright, alert, and ready to grow your business. If that doesn't sound like you, then it is time to work on your self-esteem.

Building self esteem is possible.  I should know.  I've done it.  You can too.  Let's get started.

Take five minutes a day and ask yourself what you appreciate about what you bring to the world. This will give you a burst of happiness, which is like laying the first brick of a new solid foundation. From there, move on to banishing that inner critic. When self help coaches work with people, they will often ask, “does your inner critic have a name and people tend to respond in the affirmative. It is usually the name of someone in their past, who always spoke down to them. Now they have taken that negative talk from that person and transferred it internally. When your inner critic says, “oh you can’t do that Jane,” tell it to hush and go away because you aren’t going to listen anymore. Keep working on dulling that inner critic's voice until it can no longer be heard.

In the case of not having a name for your inner critic, then just internally shout, “STOP,” whenever you catch yourself speaking negatively about you or what you are doing.

Keeping a journal is great and so is a little bedside diary. Keep that diary and pencil right beside the alarm clock and just before you go to sleep, jot down three things that you found to appreciate about yourself that day. As your diary grows, then go back and reread the comments you put in and see if they truly are positive. If you find any that may now give you a bit of a negative feeling, cross it out and rewrite it in a positive frame.

Finally consider doing positive things for you and others.

1. Treat yourself to an extra long hot bath.

2. Walk the dog for your elderly neighbour.

3. Go out of your way to find a kind thing you can do for a stranger. Open doors, or assist with putting groceries in someone’s car for them.

4. Ask before being asked if you can do something for your child’s school, like reading to kids or lending your expertise for a day to the school.

5. Go out of your way to find someone during your daily interactions that you feel needs a kind word. There is always someone who is having a tough day because of a home or work situation. You don’t have to get involved necessarily but compliment them somehow.

6. Treat yourself to something special whenever you do something outside your comfort zone.  I had a problem doing videos for a long time.  In fact, they still aren't my favorite thing to do.  But I know they are important for my business and so I do them.  And after I'm finished recording one, I treat myself to a glass of wine and time with my husband (if it's evening) or a cup of a special tea I like and some time to read (during the day).

Making yourself feel good and making others feel better about themselves is a wonderful way to build that self esteem.

And for more tips on healthy-self esteem, read my earlier post: Healthy Self-Esteem = Healthy Business!