Taking A Stand Creates an Invitation

I had always wanted to become a motivational speaker and author. Once my military service was over, I dreamed of writing a book about my experiences and touring the country as a speaker on women in the military. But then came a traumatic divorce, a sick child, and the dream was pushed to the back of my mind. I thought about a few topics that I felt passionate about and even jotted down proposals and book outlines. But life always "happened". Still I never gave up on my dream and promised myself that if the opportunity ever came, I would grab it and go.

Then I met Ken McArthur. He hosted marketing events. I had retired from the military and was working as an event planner. I was excited when Ken hired me to coordinate his events. I was even more excited when one day, after working with him for several years, he invited me to speak at one of his event. .

The seminar led to more speaking engagements...and more contacts. Eventually, it led to the publisher and editor who would help me bring my book to life. 

So now I am a speaker and an author. Maybe not exactly how I had first envisioned it. But perhaps as it was always meant to be. 

Most rewarding is knowing that I have inspired others. My daughter and her husband are working on plans for their consulting firm. My grandson is busily taking steps to create a clothing line. 

When you chase a dream, you're taking a stand for yourself and that’s powerful. It creates a beautiful invitation to others. In fact, your path might just inspire your border bullies before long. Here are a few tips for sharing your journey…

Explain What You’re Doing

When I first actually started writing my book, I discussed it with my husband every week. We'd talk about how much I had written, what I was struggling with, and  what I was doing to finish the book. 

I wanted to share my journey with my husband. I also liked the accountability that it provided. Although he would ask questions and worry about things like the cost for the editor, I didn’t let them hold me back. I realized his doubts weren’t about me—they were his own limiting beliefs. I wanted to inspire him to challenge them.

But I wouldn’t choose to share my story with someone that was toxic. I have a relative that’s negative no matter what I say or do. I didn’t share my journey with her.

Welcome Transparency

As you tell others what you’re doing, don’t be surprised if they’re inspired. I knew my grandson had been listening to me when he brought up his passion for art and design and his desire to create his own fashion line. 

When a friend or loved one starts talking about their goals or ambitions, don’t become the border bully! Offer to support them any way you can. For my grandson, I invited him to artists and designers I know and have offered to help him with his marketing..

Be Patient

I recommend letting people open up naturally. In the past year, I’ve learned that no two journeys are just alike. My daughter's path to her consulting firm and my grandson's path to being a designer look entirely different than my path to becoming an author and speaker. That doesn’t mean one is better than the other.

A person who’s just beginning to understand concepts like personal growth may not be ready to wade into deeper waters. They may not be able to commit to pursuing a BIG goal right away. But that doesn’t mean that you can’t support them. Remind your loved ones and friends that you believe in them and are rooting for their success.

Align Your Business with Your True Self for Maximum Success

Although the formal launch of my coaching program is still a few days away, I am already thrilled to be working with a great group of women - my inaugural class! I'm so excited! I can't remember the last time I was so eager to get up and get to work that I'm having difficulty sleeping! It's amazing! When your profession and your passion merge, anything seems possible!

This has been a question raised by some of my coaching team. How do we find the business that's right for us? And my answer is to find your passion and pursue it. How do you find your passion? What brings you the most joy in life? What makes you feel completely fulfilled? If you had the ability to do anything you wanted, what would it be? I love to help others grow and develop. Being present in that moment when someone takes that next big step or makes a breakthrough and knowing that I helped in some small way is almost intoxicating. What is it that makes you feel that way? You probably know. But, perhaps, like I did, you keep your true love buried.

Why? Why would someone deny their true calling? Lots of reasons. Whenever I mentioned teaching other women as a profession, my dear friends would look at me as if I wre insane. "Teach them what?", they would say. "What kind of money can you make doing that? Who would pay you enough to live on? What do you know that someone would pay you for?" Family members would remind me that they counted on me to help make ends meet and there was much to be said for a steady paycheck - even if it wasn't a very big paycheck. But the one that usually would make me sigh and turn away from my dream was the subtle hint that perhaps I thought I was too good for the likes of my blue collar family. That hard work every day was somehow beneath me. That I was, perish the thought, LAZY!

Is pressure from family members or others you respect and admire keeping you from your true profession? Don't listen to them! They may have the best of intentions, even playing match-maker with you and a career that seems to be a good fit… to them. Or it could simply be the fact that they gave up on their dreams long ago and they resent you for pursuing yours. Maybe not consciously, but deep down, they're jealous and afraid and if they can keep you on their level, they won't have to face their own failure.

Why? Why would you let someone else have control over your destiny? Perhaps you feel trapped, as I once did. A newly single mom with small children. No job skills really. I was military - in a career field that did not necessarily translate well to the civilian world. But I needed to find a way to make additional income to support my daughters. How could I possibly devote time and energy to pursuing something that may not ever pay off? I needed to make real money now for the sake of my family. Time enough for dreams later. But later never comes.

Do you feel trapped in whatever situation you currently are in? Are the doors for other opportunities closed? Perhaps you don't see a way to make it happen financially. Perhaps you think that you are too busy, too young, too old, or that it is too late. But it's never too late. And there are successful businesswomen from all age groups and walks of life. The only difference between them and you is that they dared to look beyond the barriers and imagine what could be possible. Instead of saying "I can't" they said "Maybe I could....". And once they started imagining ways to overcome the obstacles to their dreams, suddenly they were able to acknowledge that this was their purpose, their mission, their profession.

Do what you love to do. It's the key to true success. Take the time - right now! - to find your passion. Then do it! Don't worry about what others will say. Surround yourself with friends and mentors who understand that you HAVE to do this thing and will support you. Chart a plan of action to take you, step by step, to your dream. If you run into a roadblock, don't give up. Keep focused on your vision until you find a way over it, through it, or around it.

When I announced that I was FINALLY taking my business in a direction that just felt right, I received some words of encouragement from my friend and mentor, Beverly Mahone. I'd like to end this post by sharing those words with you.

"You sound so enthusiastic about this whole project and your new Boomer Biz Coach venture! If you do what you love, you'll love what you do! It definitely sounds like you have a winning combination!!!"

What's your winning combination?